dear readers (who haven't died of old age between posts)
i can only apologise for my lack of complaints over recent weeks, well that or complain about something. i think you can guess which one i'm going to go for.
i couldn't believe the stupidity of the school, they have now said that we cannot leave school for study leave. this begs the question; why call it study LEAVE, the clue is in the name.
now as you all know i'm not someone who finds fault in everything but i thought this was too stupid to leave be.
we were however told we could leave during free periods, which was everyone's plan anyway, but lets let the school think they came up with a decent idea.
that WAS my view.
but the very next day after we were first allowed to leave for free lessons the school told us that the chip shop nearby had complained because it had run out of stock, which was our fault.....
.....
DON'T SAY THAT YOU FOOLS!
essentially they've turned down our business. THEY WOULDN'T HAVE MADE MORE MONEY IF THEY'D SOLD THE FISH AT A DIFFERENT TIME!
you can't say that people can't buy things from your shop, or it's not a bloody shop!
any idiot can tell you that!
also, people in the community had complained because we were usig facilities that they wanted to use. excuse my french please: F***ING QUEUE LIKE EVERYONE ELSE HAS TO!
i'm part of the community too, if i want to use a facility i bloody well will, and there's nothing you or your ASBO can do about it.
and as an added point, why are these complainers at work!
i leave you with a solemn message, due to exams i might not post again for a little while :(
Thursday, 14 May 2009
Friday, 24 April 2009
Jeremy Kyle show
hello again, i'm sorry that there haven't been many posts over recent weeks,
the reason for this is that my computers latest 'ugrade' is playing havoc with my interweb.
essentially meaning that the upgrade means i can now do fewer things on my computer, which
makes perfect sense >_>
now, today i think it is high time that Mr Jeremy Kyle received a dose of moaning. a man who has made his living out of
the barely human creatues he herds into the studio. this show of freaks is shown day in day out, but always has the same conclusion:
Chavs always lie about everything and have at least 25 possible parents.
the people on the show are so thick, they appear to be incapable of saying anything other than swear words and 'oh my days'
i am expecting that one day soon a mother will come on wanting to know if her husband (i know, it's unlikely they're married)
has had an affair and so her child isn't hers.
the next thing i find odd is the how the problems are resolved, as far as i can see; these people go onstage, are shouted at for a bit, have a go at the lie detector test and
waddle off back to the slums, their knuckles dragging behind them.
hopefully this show will end once these people find something else to amuse themselves with, maybe after they discover fire.
the reason for this is that my computers latest 'ugrade' is playing havoc with my interweb.
essentially meaning that the upgrade means i can now do fewer things on my computer, which
makes perfect sense >_>
now, today i think it is high time that Mr Jeremy Kyle received a dose of moaning. a man who has made his living out of
the barely human creatues he herds into the studio. this show of freaks is shown day in day out, but always has the same conclusion:
Chavs always lie about everything and have at least 25 possible parents.
the people on the show are so thick, they appear to be incapable of saying anything other than swear words and 'oh my days'
i am expecting that one day soon a mother will come on wanting to know if her husband (i know, it's unlikely they're married)
has had an affair and so her child isn't hers.
the next thing i find odd is the how the problems are resolved, as far as i can see; these people go onstage, are shouted at for a bit, have a go at the lie detector test and
waddle off back to the slums, their knuckles dragging behind them.
hopefully this show will end once these people find something else to amuse themselves with, maybe after they discover fire.
Saturday, 18 April 2009
Fat TV
These days all i see on TV (other than thousands upon thousands of 'talent' shows)
are adverts for programs about fat people and their struggle. in every one of these shows
a fat person who has had a 'bad childhood' gets lypo-suction, is send on their way and then dies of their obesity anyway because they put the weight back on.
firstly these people haven't become fat BECAUSE of their childhood, they didn't wake up one morning after a particuarly hard
day with an arse the size of the oracle shopping centre! they have had to shovel food in daily at a rate of knots and do little to no exercise.
that is how obesity works!
i'm sorry, that's the truth.
secondly, why is the lypo-suction televised? it is the most disgusting thing to televise. i can't think of anybody who would look forward to watching the lypo-suction hour.
finally, they leave the hospital looking to be the same weight, having feasted on hospital food and nurses during their recovery.
often in the advert these fat people are described as being 'a drain on the NHS', i whole heartedly agree, they should have to lose weight through exercise, like us slightly overweight
individuals. but it should simply be refused rather than the powers that be simply grumbling about it.
and another thing, not only is obesity supposedly a drain on the NHS but so are: diseases, foregin illnesses, dentistry, broken legs and drug related problems.
basically anything which makes you unwell is a drain on the NHS, so think again you greedy bastards.
are adverts for programs about fat people and their struggle. in every one of these shows
a fat person who has had a 'bad childhood' gets lypo-suction, is send on their way and then dies of their obesity anyway because they put the weight back on.
firstly these people haven't become fat BECAUSE of their childhood, they didn't wake up one morning after a particuarly hard
day with an arse the size of the oracle shopping centre! they have had to shovel food in daily at a rate of knots and do little to no exercise.
that is how obesity works!
i'm sorry, that's the truth.
secondly, why is the lypo-suction televised? it is the most disgusting thing to televise. i can't think of anybody who would look forward to watching the lypo-suction hour.
finally, they leave the hospital looking to be the same weight, having feasted on hospital food and nurses during their recovery.
often in the advert these fat people are described as being 'a drain on the NHS', i whole heartedly agree, they should have to lose weight through exercise, like us slightly overweight
individuals. but it should simply be refused rather than the powers that be simply grumbling about it.
and another thing, not only is obesity supposedly a drain on the NHS but so are: diseases, foregin illnesses, dentistry, broken legs and drug related problems.
basically anything which makes you unwell is a drain on the NHS, so think again you greedy bastards.
Monday, 13 April 2009
ice cream men
today i was at a picnic, well a picnic where nobody really ate anything and we made a stupidly large number
of human pyramids.
it was good fun, i enjoyed it. but one thing ruined it. ONE little thing which causes me to rant about a generally very good day.
this is the Ice cream man.
lots of people seem to thin it's the best job in the world. but in actuality you spend the nicest days of the year in a metal cage giving
delicious confectionary to rude kids and fat parents who are pretending the 4 ice creams they order are for their kids.
today i stood in a queue for 20 odd minutes with the line seeming to never get any shorter.
i then decided to find out what was causing the delay, only to find a fat women; her arms filled with half melted lollies asking for 'a screwball without the bubblegum'
she then waited for the bubblegum to be fished out of the ice cream then refused to buy it because it wasn't new.
this sort of person should be herded en masse to the Jeremy Kyle show and killed in front of a live audience!
other than that, a good day :)
of human pyramids.
it was good fun, i enjoyed it. but one thing ruined it. ONE little thing which causes me to rant about a generally very good day.
this is the Ice cream man.
lots of people seem to thin it's the best job in the world. but in actuality you spend the nicest days of the year in a metal cage giving
delicious confectionary to rude kids and fat parents who are pretending the 4 ice creams they order are for their kids.
today i stood in a queue for 20 odd minutes with the line seeming to never get any shorter.
i then decided to find out what was causing the delay, only to find a fat women; her arms filled with half melted lollies asking for 'a screwball without the bubblegum'
she then waited for the bubblegum to be fished out of the ice cream then refused to buy it because it wasn't new.
this sort of person should be herded en masse to the Jeremy Kyle show and killed in front of a live audience!
other than that, a good day :)
Sunday, 12 April 2009
an unusually short post
a few days ago i was socked to find the headline on The Newbury Weekly News to be
'Lifeguard praised for saving Drowning Child'. now, i don't know about you
but that is the lifeguard's job. the clue is sort of in the name. why should
this person be praised for doing his job? quite frankly, following this up i expect to be on the frontpage
myself soon, being praised for attending school.
maybe 'Chav Praised for intimidating Old Person' will be next weeks headline.
who knows?
but to be honest i want actual news, something shocking that i wouldn't expect to happen in a normal day
'Lifeguard praised for saving Drowning Child'. now, i don't know about you
but that is the lifeguard's job. the clue is sort of in the name. why should
this person be praised for doing his job? quite frankly, following this up i expect to be on the frontpage
myself soon, being praised for attending school.
maybe 'Chav Praised for intimidating Old Person' will be next weeks headline.
who knows?
but to be honest i want actual news, something shocking that i wouldn't expect to happen in a normal day
Wednesday, 8 April 2009
the 'nudge' button
just a quick one today,
the 'nudge' button, the bane of the average msn user.
what is it's use other than to annoy? (rheatorical question to the annoying comments people, you know who you are)
i'll be having a quite normal conversation with one of my contacts when suddenly my computer contracts parkinsons disease and windows
vibrate left right and centre. this is supposedly a nudge, although to be fair it's more of a tremor.
the use of this button will annoy anyone you use it on, for you see there is already a fairly good warning system that shows when you've just received a message,
a orange flashing icon and a sound like a car alarm. if you're not sharp enough to release this might mean something, you probably won't release that the vibrating window is also a warning.
in fact, if you're that daft you're more likely to duck under the table mistaking it for an earthquake.
it is for this reason that i think that 'nudge' should be changed to 'prat about'
the 'nudge' button, the bane of the average msn user.
what is it's use other than to annoy? (rheatorical question to the annoying comments people, you know who you are)
i'll be having a quite normal conversation with one of my contacts when suddenly my computer contracts parkinsons disease and windows
vibrate left right and centre. this is supposedly a nudge, although to be fair it's more of a tremor.
the use of this button will annoy anyone you use it on, for you see there is already a fairly good warning system that shows when you've just received a message,
a orange flashing icon and a sound like a car alarm. if you're not sharp enough to release this might mean something, you probably won't release that the vibrating window is also a warning.
in fact, if you're that daft you're more likely to duck under the table mistaking it for an earthquake.
it is for this reason that i think that 'nudge' should be changed to 'prat about'
Tuesday, 7 April 2009
old people
i went to see my nan yesterday, and i have recently begun to see how odd elderly people can be
(this is not a personal attack on my own grandmother, just a reason as to why i'm going to rant about the old.)
the first thing i've noticed is that whenever you talk to old people and you ask them a question, for example:
'do you know where that new restaurant in town is?' the moment you then answer the question they'll immediately reply with 'NO!' or
'OH!'
in a really exagerated way, even if the don't really care about what you're talking about.
the next odd thing is their incredible ability to include people you don't know into a conversation. 'do you know Arthur', you don't. you clearly don't. you probably don't even
live in the same town any more, just so it seems obvious that you wouldn't know their old boring friend!
but still they ask. whether you answer yes or no they still then go along the same line, there is no difference to what they were going to say whatsoever. i'm convinced that these
friends don't even exist and the old person just lies for a while about something that may or may not have happened for a while.
i bet you though that if this friend of theirs does exist they'll constantly be the victim of 'you know?'
and nothing ever happens in the old persons life at all because they spend all there time asking if people know who other people are.
the next odd thing is the inventions given to old people to help them with their daily lives, the stair lift for example. if the old person is well enough to need to travel up the stairs enough to do things on different levels, they clearly don't need it
what was wrong with old people living in bungalows, that was so much easier!
however, stair lifts do give me much enjoyment, for example if you stop the down button from working in some way you can trap your old person at the top of the stairs, this means you know longer have to watch the cookery shows on TV in the living room, as they're
not around to complain. you're also free from 'you know Mildred?'
NO! i bloody well don't!
if you're an old person who's managed to come on the internet to read my blog. well done
(this is not a personal attack on my own grandmother, just a reason as to why i'm going to rant about the old.)
the first thing i've noticed is that whenever you talk to old people and you ask them a question, for example:
'do you know where that new restaurant in town is?' the moment you then answer the question they'll immediately reply with 'NO!' or
'OH!'
in a really exagerated way, even if the don't really care about what you're talking about.
the next odd thing is their incredible ability to include people you don't know into a conversation. 'do you know Arthur', you don't. you clearly don't. you probably don't even
live in the same town any more, just so it seems obvious that you wouldn't know their old boring friend!
but still they ask. whether you answer yes or no they still then go along the same line, there is no difference to what they were going to say whatsoever. i'm convinced that these
friends don't even exist and the old person just lies for a while about something that may or may not have happened for a while.
i bet you though that if this friend of theirs does exist they'll constantly be the victim of 'you know
and nothing ever happens in the old persons life at all because they spend all there time asking if people know who other people are.
the next odd thing is the inventions given to old people to help them with their daily lives, the stair lift for example. if the old person is well enough to need to travel up the stairs enough to do things on different levels, they clearly don't need it
what was wrong with old people living in bungalows, that was so much easier!
however, stair lifts do give me much enjoyment, for example if you stop the down button from working in some way you can trap your old person at the top of the stairs, this means you know longer have to watch the cookery shows on TV in the living room, as they're
not around to complain. you're also free from 'you know Mildred?'
NO! i bloody well don't!
if you're an old person who's managed to come on the internet to read my blog. well done
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